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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29637372">This Plain Unnatural Life</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/triiqoree/pseuds/triiqoree'>triiqoree</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Deja Vu, Fluff, Friendship, Getting to Know Each Other, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Post-Game(s), Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, as a treat, everyone is alive though don’t worry :), the rest of the cast is only mentioned, the tags are vague on purpose, theyre besties, well the body discovery scene is there so, will tag more as we progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-05-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 05:56:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,906</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29637372</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/triiqoree/pseuds/triiqoree</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Is there something you need?” Shuichi asked. The boy’s eyes creeped him out, strangely enough. Analytical and curious, like he was trying to pry answers out of him. </p><p>He felt seen by them. Nobody here paid attention to him unless he was upset, so someone actually making conversation with him was...unnatural.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>58</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Quality Fics</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>sorry for not writing anything im mentally ill. </p><p>the songs that inspired this are <a href="https://youtu.be/vhYsFIDAt2I">this</a> and <a href="https://youtu.be/Un4JS7f6KLQ">this</a> please check them out they’re good</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Oi! Saihara!” A voice grabbed his attention from his book, he looked up with a curious expression. “Did you hear? A new kid is supposed to be joining our class in a few days.” <br/>
<br/>
</p><p>“Really?” Shuichi asked. “Do you know their name?” He dog-eared his page and set his book down, looking at his classmate expectantly. </p><p> </p><p>“Ouma...something, I don’t know their first name.” The student said. He stroked his goatee thoughtfully before looking at the blonde girl next to him. “What about you?” </p><p> </p><p>“No idea.” The blonde girl sighed. “But it’s the most exciting thing that’s happened in a while.” She sighed and placed her head in her arms. “It’s been so boring…” </p><p> </p><p>“Right?” The boy huffed. “I’d kill for something to happen.” </p><p> </p><p>Shuichi froze for a moment, his fingers starting to tremble before he took a deep breath. Just calm down. In and out, just like his uncle taught him. It was fine. </p><p> </p><p>“Saihara?” The blonde girl called. “You okay? You look a little pale…” </p><p> </p><p>“F-fine! I’m fine.” Shuichi said quickly. “Just fine.” He let out a nervous laugh and picked up his book again, hoping they’d go back to ignoring him. </p><p> </p><p>The two students shrugged and went back to having another conversation, not bothering him for the rest of the class period.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>The next day wasn’t a school day, thankfully. He hadn’t exactly felt well ever since that kid had mentioned killing. He wasn’t even squeamish, far from it, but the thought of someone killing the other...made him sick to his stomach. </p><p> </p><p>Shuichi’s thankful that his uncle noticed his distress and sent him to the store. A distraction that didn’t stress him out was always welcome. </p><p> </p><p>As he picked out the...questionable stuff his uncle asked him to get, he felt eyes boring into his back. He was being watched. He couldn’t see anyone following him, but the presence remained no matter where he went.</p><p> </p><p>“Excuse me?” A tap on his shoulder broke his train of thought, his attention being brought to a short boy with dark hair. “Hi, stranger!” </p><p> </p><p>“Is there something you need?” Shuichi asked. The boy’s eyes creeped him out, strangely enough. Analytical and curious, like he was trying to pry answers out of him. </p><p> </p><p>He felt seen by them. Nobody here paid attention to him unless he was upset, so someone actually making conversation with him was...unnatural. </p><p> </p><p>“I was just wondering if there was any strawberry panta around. It’s my first time here and I can’t seem to find it.” </p><p> </p><p>Strawberry panta? That felt wrong. Unnatural. </p><p> </p><p>“I think you seem more of a grape panta person,” Shuichi said warily. “Are you sure you want strawberry?” </p><p> </p><p>“Grape?!” The boy gasped. “I would never ever drink grape panta! It’s disgusting and I hate it!” It felt wrong to hear the boy say that, everything about what he was saying felt...off. </p><p> </p><p>“Helloooo?” The boy let out an exaggerated sigh before twisting a lock of hair around his finger. “If I’m so boring I’ll just ask someone else.” </p><p> </p><p>“N-no no, it’s fine,” Shuichi said quickly. “I’ll show you.” </p><p> </p><p>“Good! Everyone else in this dumb town is sooooo mean to me! They all ignore me!”  The boy pouted, looking heartbroken for a moment before cheering up immediately. “Oh well! As long as I have my soda.” </p><p> </p><p>“It’s just over here.” Shuichi hummed, bringing the boy over to the aisle. </p><p> </p><p>“Thinking about it, I think I will get that grape stuff! Where is it?” </p><p> </p><p>“Right there.” Shuichi pointed to a bottle of grape soda, watching as the other boy walked up and took it. </p><p> </p><p>“Thank you, sir! Say, you go to Spring Field Academy, right?” The boy asked. “Me too! I’ll be starting there next week.” </p><p> </p><p>“Really?” Shuichi asked. “So you’re Ouma then.” </p><p> </p><p>“The one and only Ouma Kokichi!” Shuichi paused at his name, looking Ouma over once again. No, he was sure he hadn't met him before. He couldn't have, he would've known. The boy was so achingly familiar though...like Shuichi had met him once a long time ago. </p><p> </p><p>“Have we met before?” Shuichi asked. Maybe Ouma felt the same way. He had to have with the warmth he looked at Shuichi with. </p><p> </p><p>“Nope! Unless…” Ouma trailed off, his eyes sparkling. “Maybe we were lovers in a past life! A past you telling yourself you know me!” </p><p> </p><p>“Ah...um…” Shuichi frowned, hesitating for a moment. He felt like he knew him. Then again, everyone he went to class with left him with a sense of deja vu too. “Maybe so.” He settled on. "It's nice to meet you, Ouma-kun." </p><p> </p><p>“I sure hope it is! Anyways, give me your name too! It’s only fair.” </p><p> </p><p>“Saihara Shuichi.” He hummed. It felt as though Ouma already knew it, but that was fine. Maybe he was just having an off day again...those had been happening a lot lately.</p><p> </p><p>“Nice to meet you, Saihara-chan! I hope to see you soon!” Ouma waved goodbye before leaving, not even bothering to pay for the drink. </p><p> </p><p>What an odd person.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“So excited over a library! Must be amazing.”</p><p>“It has everything I’ve ever wanted in it…” Shuichi said. “It’s mainly mystery stuff though, so if you don’t like anything like that, I don’t think you’d enjoy it very much.”</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>this will be the only time I ever update this fast !! ever . maybe . </p><p>anyways enjoy. hbbwaahhbbbh sorry if it’s disappointing I wrote most of this in a 4 AM delirium while kissing my wife in stardew valley</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Shuichi found himself enamored with Ouma, strangely enough. The other boy was so unlike everyone else he had ever spoken to in this town, so strange and unique. He gave off a familiar feeling, one that nearly gave Shuichi a migraine just trying to figure it out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe that silly soulmates thing had been true after all, however out of this world it seemed. It was a silly possibility to think about, but it was still amusing all the same. Ouma could be lying to him and he knew him, after all. The familiarity in his voice whenever he said Saihara’s name was undisputable, the warmth he looked at Shuichi with was…Well, it was enough to embarrass him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The way Ouma looked at him was like he had seen a close friend after a very long time. It was strange, but he decided to not think about it anymore. His uncle distracted him with chores to keep his mind off of it, anyway. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When he showed up to school, he wasn’t expecting Ouma to be bugging that brown-haired girl with red eyes. Even though Shuichi didn’t even know her name, he was sure he’d rather keep it that way.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why, if it isn’t Saihara-chan!” Ouma called. “Wow! Hey, Mystery-chan, isn’t he so cool?” He poked at a girl with long pigtails, letting out a teasing laugh as she glared at him with annoyance. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ouma-kun, leave her alone.” Shuichi huffed. “She looks like she’s about to kill you.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“She won’t do anything to me! Watch this!” He leaned over and yanked her hair, letting out a loud whinny of laughter as the girl only sat up with a glare and walked away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ouma-kun, you didn’t need to do that…” Shuichi sighed in disappointment. “Don’t cause any trouble, you just started school here.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah! Just started and I hate it already!” Ouma picked at the badges on the collar of his jacket, his expression sour. “So stuffy! Anyway, do you know her name?” He asked curiously. “She didn’t even give me a name! So rude! I told you so, Saihara-chan, everyone here hates me!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Uhh...no. I don’t know anyone in the class.” Shuichi said quietly. “Nobody pays attention to me, so I just mind my business.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ooooh I see,” Ouma said thoughtfully. “Then I’ll be your new friend! Everyone else here seems sooo boring...not even worth getting to know!” He let out a sad, drawn-out sigh, resting his head in his palms. “You chose such a boring place to live, Saihara-chan. I think it suits you though!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You just said I was interesting…and it’s not like I chose where I was born!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“A lie! You’re the most boring person I’ve ever met!” Ouma laughed. “So plain! But this place is peaceful, isn’t it? I bet you like it a lot.” He twirled his hair around his finger thoughtfully, making a low humming noise. “Do you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I do,” Shuichi admitted. “It’s so quiet here. I haven’t really ever had a problem, anyway.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The place where I lived was the complete opposite! Murders happening left and right. It was crazy! I even conducted one myself...I nearly got killed too! </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“T-that’s a lie, right?” Shuichi gawked. “Please tell me you’re lying, Ouma-kun.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Maybe!” Ouma chirped. “You’re next on my list, nishishi~” As Shuichi’s expression turned more disturbed, Ouma sighed and gave up. “I’m joking, Saihara-chan. I‘m a pacifist!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“...right,” Shuichi mumbled. “You’re a little weird, Ouma-kun.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So rude!” Ouma pouted. “You’re so mean to me, Saihara-chan. Is this how you normally treat your friends?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry.” He wasn’t. From the incredulous look on Ouma’s face, the other boy knew it too.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So when does class start? Or is the teacher just absent all the time?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The teacher’s only here every few days. She’s too busy.” He was thankful that she was. Sometimes, he would have too much of a headache to deal with classes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ooh, I see! She’s lazy!” Ouma said. “Lucky me, I want to talk to you more!” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Shuichi wanted the same as Ouma began chattering on about his old town. His old friends, family, even things he wanted to do in this one. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’ll hang out with me, right?” He asked. “Show me every detail of this place! I need to know it like the back of my hand.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sure,” Shuichi replied. “My uncle needs me after school, but I can tomorrow?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s a date!” Ouma chirped. “My very own personal guide! How exciting!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There isn’t much here though...well, there is a library…” Shuichi smiled at the thought of going there. As much as he enjoyed sleeping all day on his off days, the library provided a different comfort. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He found himself there a lot lately. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So excited over a library! Must be amazing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It has everything I’ve ever wanted in it…” Shuichi said. “It’s mainly mystery stuff though, so if you don’t like anything like that, I don’t think you’d enjoy it very much.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I guess we’ll see.” Ouma hummed. He looked at the clock in the room with a frown. “It’s time to leave already? Wow, time flies, huh?” He winced as the bell rang, covering his ears at the shrill noise.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I guess it does,” Shuichi said with a smile. “I better get going then. See you, Ouma-kun.” He grabbed his bag, waved goodbye, and left the classroom. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His uncle ended up just needing him to go to the store for some kind of yogurt. The trip is easy enough, but he looks behind himself constantly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He doesn’t know why, but there’s always a feeling that he might get taken somewhere terrible if he doesn’t look after himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was fine. He’s just paranoid is all. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After his trip and his chores, Shuichi finds himself more tired than anything. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A bit of sleep won’t hurt much.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>~</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shuichi's standing in a library. Fear sits in his stomach, more from the thought of "what's going to happen to us?" than the body.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>There are people around him, people that are familiar but ones he can't name. He can tell that they're scared. A girl with pigtails is screaming after all. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shuichi re-examines the body. Green hair, covered in blood...he checked for any breathing already. But sure enough, the boy is dead. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>His eyes keep following that blonde girl, and he knows she did this. She looks guilty and regretful, and he...he feels sorry for her.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Who were these people though? He knows they're kids from his school, but he can't name them at all. He should, he knows he should, but he can't. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The door bursts open, more teenagers flood in. He couldn't pay attention to them, there's too much happening. He's trying to figure out what happened, but he </span>
  </em>
  <span>can't</span>
  <em>
    <span>...god he's useless, this is what he's supposed to be good at. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>The door bursts open and finally someone he can name is there. Ouma. Ouma's here, but why is he here? Why is Shuichi here? Why is there a dead body, what's going on?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Why does it feel so frustratingly familiar? He's never been here before, hell, he's never even seen a dead body before, so why does he think he knows what's about to happen? </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It's just a nightmare, surely. His mind is playing tricks on him again. He should wake up. It's a bad dream, he just needs to wake up. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>~</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His uncle shakes him awake. He comments about how Shuichi is crying, but Shuichi can't hear him. It felt so real, so paralyzingly real. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He hoped it was a nightmare.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>ty for reading have a good day and pls drink some water</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Nope.” The detective hummed. “We’re sleeping in today.” </p><p>With a frustrated huff, Ouma gave up. “Fine. I never knew you were the lazy type.” </p><p>“I’m full of surprises, aren’t I?”</p><p>“You’re a pain in the ass.” Ouma said. </p><p>“You like me,” Shuichi cooed with a smirk.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>If you saw this earlier no u didn’t</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Hey, Saihara-chan? Are you okay? You’ve been spacing out.” Ouma asked as he placed a book back in its place on the shelf. “Is that corner of the library interesting or something?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The corner of the library...yes, he had been staring at it for the time they had been there. It matched the one in his dream. It was the exact same, the only missing part being the body and the blood-stained shot putt ball. </span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>Shuichi shook his head and sighed. “I’m fine, Ouma-kun. Don’t worry about it. I...I just had a weird dream last night, I guess.” He gave his friend a weak smile, hoping to prove his words. From Ouma’s expression, it didn’t.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What kind of dream was it?” Ouma asked, his expression rounding with curiosity. “If you were freaked out enough to remember it, it must be important.” </span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“It wasn’t. I um...You can’t really help anyway.” Shuichi let out a defeated laugh, before meeting Ouma’s eyes again. Why did he look so pained at his words? “Forget I even said anything, really, don’t worry about it!” </span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“I think you should talk about it.” Ouma hummed. “It’s good, y’know?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“M-maybe later,” Shuichi said. </span>
</p><p>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“Promise?” Ouma held out his pinkie, an easy smile coming back onto his face. He took his pinkie with his own, his expression growing curious as Ouma didn’t let go. “You have to lock it with your thumb! How will I know you’ll keep it?” He pressed the pad of his thumb to Shuichi’s, letting out a laugh. </span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>A wave of deja vu washed over him again, the kind that always did whenever Ouma did anything like this. The feeling made him feel wistful, like he missed something dearly. </span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“Ouma-kun, are you sure that we haven’t met before?” </span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“As I said, maybe we were lovers in a past life!” Ouma laughed. “Do you think we’re star-crossed?! Destined to forget each other forever and ever?!” Ouma pouted again, false tears in his eyes as he let out a sobbing noise. “If Saihara-chan ever forgot about me...It would break my heart!”</span>
  <span></span><br/>

  <span><br/>
</span>
  <span>“I-I wouldn’t have forgotten anything like that!” Shuichi said, alarmed. “I wouldn’t have forgotten anyone like </span>
  <em>
    <span>you,</span>
  </em>
  <span> anyway.” Did that sound weird? God, that probably sounded weird. He had just met this boy a few days ago, he didn’t need to be saying anything like that already. Was he really that desperate for someone that actually paid attention to him? Probably. He must’ve sounded odd, that’s why Ouma wasn’t-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ehhh stop thinking so loud..” The other boy said exasperatedly. “I’m your best friend forever, I get it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ah...really?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yup yup! But I’m glad you won’t ever forget about me. Now get me out of this stuffy library! I wanna see </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span>!” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The rest of the tour went by quickly enough. The town was small enough to walk through the main part of it in a short amount of time, it was barely noon by the time they were done.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Oddly enough, Shuichi found himself unable to answer some of Ouma’s questions. How long things had been open, shop owners, sometimes even what the shops sold. It didn’t make any sense, he’s lived here his entire life and yet he drew a blank. None of it even felt </span>
  <em>
    <span>familiar</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry for just dragging you around…” Shuichi muttered. Ouma glanced at him before shrugging.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s fine! I don’t really care. I can figure things out on my own, y’know?” Ouma stopped before grinning to himself, a downright evil expression on his face. “You know what would make up for it though?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hang out with me tomorrow too. You look like you’re having fun!” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Shuichi paused and thought for a moment. Yeah, he supposed he did. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am. It...It’s always been a bit boring here. I guess it’s not even worth remembering. But you um…” He felt a smile crawl onto his face, his face heating up with embarrassment. “You make it a little more bearable.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ouma gaped at him for a moment before grinning. “I’m glad! But I have a-“ Ouma was cut off by his phone ringing, humming in annoyance as he took it out of his pocket, “-a phone call, apparently. I probably have to go then, Hinata-chan will get upset if I’m not home soon.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh..okay.” He couldn’t help the sadness that he felt as Ouma gathered his things to leave. He wanted...he wanted to spend more time with him, even if it was only a little. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>God, he must’ve been bored out of his mind. Before Ouma moved in, he wondered how long he would’ve gone without realizing it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bye bye, Saihara-chan! Oh—and text me about that dream you had earlier, okay? I almost forgot!” With a wave goodbye, Ouma left, leaving Shuichi alone.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>~</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He’d fallen asleep instead of texting Ouma, deciding that he’d rather risk tormenting himself with dreams rather than tell him what’s wrong. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This one didn’t feel cold though, instead feeling warm and comforting. Filled with the smell of freshly washed sheets and graham crackers. Like home, he muses with a small smile to himself. It’s nice and peaceful, and he can only hope that he’s allowed to indulge in it just a bit more. He feels his eyes start to shut again before a familiar voice stops them.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Shuichi...” Ouma says, his voice raspy. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What?” He mumbled as he shifted closer to Ouma, holding him tightly as the other boy let out a noise of annoyance.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Mmm...you might wanna get to your room so space boy won’t suspect anything.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Don’t want to.” Shuichi replied. “Let's spend today in here.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I don’t think we should.” Ouma said. “I need to check something out—hey!” He squirmed as Shuichi held him closer, giving him a cross look. “Shuichi!” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Nope.” The detective hummed. “We’re sleeping in today.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>With a frustrated huff, Ouma gave up. “Fine. I never knew you were the lazy type.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m full of surprises, aren’t I?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You’re a pain in the ass.” Ouma said. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You like me,” Shuichi cooed with a smirk. “‘Saihara-chan, I didn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>mean </span>
  <em>
    <span>to kiss you after you bandaged my finger! I hurt my finger playing the knife game on purpose, not because I like you or anything!’” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I freaked out!” Ouma squawked as Shuichi held his hand in his, his finger tracing over the bandage gently. “You should’ve seen the look on your face after I did though. It was hilarious.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Like yours was any better.” Shuichi muttered. “You looked like you were about to explode.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“So mean to me.” Ouma said, letting his eyes flutter shut. He held Shuichi’s hand just a bit tighter, and Shuichi smiled fondly. “I like you, though.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>He found himself hoping for more days like this. </span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>For the killing game to end so</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span> they could have more lazy days in bed. Where it was safe and warm and he didn’t have to worry about anything anymore. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I like you too, Kokichi.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>~</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Shuichi opened his eyes and pulled himself up, feeling more confused than when he had gone to bed. Was he...was he </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> having romantic dreams about some boy he had met just a few days ago? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>How was he supposed to talk to Ouma after </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span>. And it felt like he was just...reliving it. He surely would’ve remembered Ouma if they had done anything like that, so why didn’t he? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He just needed to think. Concentrate. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>had </span>
  </em>
  <span>to have known Ouma, it didn’t make sense for him to start dreaming of such odd things right when he shows up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ouma had a scar on the hand he had held in the dream, how could he have gotten that? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He could ask. He had his number, he could call him. Yeah, that sounded good. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ouma answered on the third ring, which surprised him given how late it was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Finally gonna tell me what’s-“ </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How’d you get the scar on your finger? T-the one on your ring finger?” Shuichi cut him off, frowning in thought. According to the dream, the knife game had caused it. If Ouma answered with that then...then something was wrong. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Oh? You don’t want to unlock my tragic backstory first?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Ouma asked. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Fine. Just because I like you.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>The words made Shuichi freeze for a moment before he took a deep breath. He’s just saying that because they’re friends, it’s echoing dream Ouma purely by coincidence.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>I stabbed it playing the knife game~ afterwards I got my first kiss.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Ouma sighed dreamily, Shuichi could imagine that </span>
  <em>
    <span>stupid familiar and fond smile</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It could just be coincidental, he could blame it on that. He had a feeling that that might just be better to do. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ah..a-ah umm…that’s nice, I guess…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Why the sudden interest?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Ouma asked. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Does it ring any bells?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ring any…? What do you mean?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Are you remembering something? Not to be mean or anything, Saihara-chan, but you sure are forgetful.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s...it’s nothing important.” Shuichi replied. “If I forgot it, it wasn’t important.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>I think things like that are really important.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Ouma said with a sigh. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Try to remember it, okay?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I...alright, Ouma-kun. I'll try.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>Remember that I like you, no matter what.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>The other boy hummed. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Nothing was your fault, okay? Goodnight, Saihara-chan!” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>With that, Ouma hung up, leaving Shuichi alone once again.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>time to reread wings of fire. pls remember to grab a snack and drink some water !!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>He could still have his friends.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>damn it’s been like *checks clock* a month. hope y’all are feeling good. also ive been feeling rlly incompetent lately so if this chapter changes any uhhh look away </p><p>make sure you reread the tags u silly geese</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Shuichi deals with the worst migraine he’s ever had after that dream. It hurt far too much to even get out of bed, much less go to school. </p><p> </p><p>He wondered if Ouma was worried about him...he hoped wasn’t, he was already worrying far too many people already. Shuichi didn’t need to worry someone else, especially when said person was the only one he liked. </p><p> </p><p>His uncle lets him stay home, luckily, and he spends his day trying to rest. At least...he <em> was </em>. Unfortunately, he doesn’t stay in bed for too long. He felt too restless after that dream, that stupid flustering dream. </p><p> </p><p>It was a nice change of pace from the first one, but it was still...<em> confusing </em>. It stirred something in his brain, making him agitated that he couldn’t name the exact moment when it had happened. Shuichi sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. </p><p> </p><p>He could understand his...<em> wishful </em> thinking about Ouma. Ouma was pretty and interesting, of course, he would develop <em> something </em>. It was the other boy’s ability to quote the dream that unnerved him. How Ouma always hinted that he needed to remember something…</p><p> </p><p>Did he? </p><p> </p><p>The pounding in his head made him pause as he got up, letting out a soft noise of pain as he touched it gingerly. It wasn’t getting any better, even if he had drunk water earlier. </p><p> </p><p>A nap might help him, even if he’s risking <em> more </em> dreams. He needed to find out more anyways. Why that green-haired boy had been murdered. Why Ouma seemed like he knew something. </p><p> </p><p>He could just confront Ouma, his classmate didn’t seem like he would hide anything. Then again, he didn’t want to make Ouma think he was crazy. </p><p> </p><p>...It couldn’t hurt. </p><p> </p><p>Shuichi grabbed his phone, squinting at its brightness. He texted Ouma to come over after school, closing his eyes afterward. He wanted to <em> sleep </em>, he had been so tired lately. </p><p> </p><p>Did he want to risk dreams though? For whatever reason, there was a pit in his stomach at the thought of them. He was curious though. The thought of someone looking at him the way Ouma did, the way Ouma <em> does </em> was so… </p><p> </p><p>He wanted to be looked at and <em> seen </em>. No artificial affection, just real genuine care. Maybe that’s why he’d gotten so attached, attached enough to come up with odd false scenarios. </p><p> </p><p>When he drifted off, he couldn’t help but start to think fondly of the warmth in his chest.</p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Hey...Shuichi.” Kokichi’s voice was quiet, hushed like he was nervous. “Are you awake?”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Mmm, what?” Shuichi hummed. “It’s too early…”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “...you don’t regret any of this, do you?” Kokichi asked. He held Shuichi tighter, pressing his nose deeper into the crook of his neck.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Of course not,” Shuichi replied gently. “Never.” He pulled away from Kokichi to meet his eyes. “I really do care about you, Kokichi.”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Hah, I care about you too.” Kokichi smiled at him, letting out a small laugh. “But y’know, I could do something evil. Since I’m the supreme leader of evil, it’s just in my nature. Would you like me then?”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “...I don’t think you’re evil, Kokichi. I’d try to understand.” Shuichi said. “I always want to understand you.”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “You’re so weird.” Kokichi sighed. “But I like that about you. My lazy, silly, weird detective.”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Like you’re any better. I’m not lazy, by the way.”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “You sure like spending your days in bed.” Kokichi huffed, rolling his eyes. “‘Kokichi, I don’t wanna get up! Kokichi, just a nap, please?’” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “It’s comfy.” Shuichi laughed. “Especially when you’re—“  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Stop stop stop! No more, you sap.” Kokichi wrinkled his nose before pressing it back into the crook of his neck. “You’re so embarrassing.”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Sure. Let’s get back to sleep, then.”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> ~ </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The warmth in Shuichi’s chest didn’t go away as he woke up. The soothing dream made his heartache with how sickeningly sweet it was. </p><p> </p><p>“Good morning sleepyhead!” Ouma’s voice jolted him away, sitting up to stare at the other boy. </p><p> </p><p>“When did you get here?!” Shuichi squawked. </p><p> </p><p>“Not long!” Ouma hummed. “I hung out with your uncle a bit, but it was pretty one-sided. He’s so <em> boring </em> here.” </p><p> </p><p>There that phrasing was again. </p><p> </p><p>“Ouma-kun...can I ask a question?” Ouma tilted his head, his eyes gleaming with curiosity. </p><p> </p><p>“Shoot.” </p><p> </p><p>“I’ve been having really weird dreams-“</p><p> </p><p>“That’s not exactly something you tell someone,” Ouma teased. “I mean, I’m flattered, but-“ </p><p> </p><p>“That’s not it!” Shuichi huffed. “It’s something else. I um...Ouma-kun, there’s something on my mind.” He shifted nervously, glancing at the ground. </p><p> </p><p>Should he do this? The unease in his stomach stirred, or maybe it was just embarrassment from the dreams. </p><p> </p><p>“Well? I can totally give you all the answers you-“ </p><p> </p><p>“We know each other, don’t we?” Shuichi cut him off, meeting Ouma’s eyes. “In some sort of...killing game, I think.” </p><p> </p><p>The playfulness left Ouma’s eyes immediately upon the words, his expression becoming dead serious. “Maybe. I don’t know, Saihara-chan.” </p><p> </p><p>“We were um...together in that, weren’t we? Romantically, I mean.” Shuichi asked. “I don’t know why I would ever forget that.” </p><p> </p><p>“...I don’t know either!” Ouma muttered, almost bitterly. “I can’t help you though. In remembering at least, not me! That’s a you problem, Saihara-chan!” </p><p> </p><p>“That’s fine, I just…” Shuichi trailed off, glancing around his room. If they were in a killing game before, where were they now? “Where are we now? Are we safe?” </p><p> </p><p>“You are, but I’m not.” The other boy sighed dramatically, examining his nails disinterestedly. “You and your sappy brain are trying to drag me in with you. Pssh, if I weren’t a Supreme Leader I would’ve lost already!” </p><p> </p><p>“Ouma-kun, what happened to me?” </p><p> </p><p>“You survived, I guess,” Ouma replied quietly. “Whatever. I don’t want to talk about it right now. Thought I could, but I guess not! It can wait a little longer-“</p><p> </p><p>“I want to understand you,” Shuichi murmured. The words made the other boy freeze for a moment before he turned to leave. </p><p> </p><p>"Ouma-kun don't go!" Shuichi cried, reaching out and grabbing his wrist. Ouma whipped around to glare at him, fuming. </p><p> </p><p>“I want to understand,” Shuichi repeated. “Please let me understand…” </p><p> </p><p>"Why'd you do it?" Ouma snapped suddenly. "Where did that promise to live go?! You said you were ready to die in the game, but you also said that you were going to live." </p><p> </p><p>"If I hadn't..." Ouma trailed off, glaring at the ground. "If I hadn't done what I did, would you be here? Or if I wasn't here at all..." the angry expression faded, becoming more subdued.</p><p> </p><p>"If I wasn't here, would you have done this? Would you have done something worse?" Ouma met his eyes, shaking his head and clutching his fist in frustration. “This is so fucking <em> stupid </em>. I can’t understand a single thing you do.” </p><p> </p><p>“Sorry.” Shuichi murmured. “I don’t know what I did but...but I’m sorry, whatever it was.” </p><p> </p><p>“I don’t want an apology.” Ouma whipped his eyes, taking his hand away from Shuichi’s so he could cover his face. “I want you back.” </p><p> </p><p>As Ouma’s shoulders started to shake, Shuichi pulled him close and hugged him tight. Whatever he meant was hurting him, it drenched his words in a guilt that Shuichi couldn’t bear to listen to. </p><p> </p><p>“It’s okay,” Shuichi soothed. “I’ll...I’ll figure it out. I know you can’t tell me now, at least. I’ll try to remember.” </p><p> </p><p>“I don’t know if that’s a good thing anymore.” Ouma said resentfully. “Are you happy here, Saihara-chan?”</p><p> </p><p>Happy? </p><p> </p><p>...was he? Wherever this was, it bent to suit his needs. He thinks he understands it a little now that Ouma confirmed they were <em> somewhere </em> that wasn’t real. </p><p> </p><p>The people around him weren’t <em> real. </em> If they were, they were under some sort of trance or something. That must be why he’s always felt so...so <em> lonely </em> until Ouma came around. </p><p> </p><p>Ouma was real though. From his memories, the other boy made him happy too. </p><p> </p><p>“I don’t think I am.” </p><p> </p><p>“Then I guess we still have work to do.” Ouma laughed. He sniffled again, pulling away to whip his face. “I think you’re trying to stop me though, I got stopped on the way over here so many times.” </p><p> </p><p>“Sorry?” </p><p> </p><p>“Not your fault—well, it <em> is </em> , but not <em> yours </em>. The dummy that got himself into this mess.” He leaned over to Shuichi’s ear and yelled: “You aren’t gonna stop me, Shuichi!”</p><p> </p><p>“Ow! What the hell?” </p><p> </p><p>“Just wanted to make sure you heard me!” Ouma smiled at him, glowing with affection that made him red in the face. </p><p> </p><p>“Another question though, why didn’t you tell me earlier?” </p><p> </p><p>“Ah! I don’t think you would’ve believed me. I mean, would you believe me if I walked up to you in a store and went ‘Hey! Did you know we’re actually <em> lovers </em> from a <em> killing game </em>that you forgot about? Fun fact: this place is also a simulation, this is totes a normal everyday thing!’” </p><p> </p><p>“...no.” </p><p> </p><p>“<em> Exactly </em>. How did Hinata-chan phrase it...I’m here to jog the memories? They can’t really remove you from here without you remembering everything.” Ouma sighed, closing his eyes. He grabbed Shuichi’s hand, pressing it to his chest so he could feel the gentle thump of his heart.</p><p> </p><p>“Ah—Ouma-“ </p><p> </p><p>“I’m alive, okay? I could never be mad at you for what happened.” </p><p> </p><p><em> “You survived, I guess.” </em> Ouma’s words made him shiver. If Ouma died then...what if he was lying? What if he wasn’t alive? </p><p> </p><p>Maybe he forgot for a reason.</p><p> </p><p>“Okay, I believe you.” </p><p> </p><p>“Great! Now go to bed, so you can remember more.” Ouma smiled cheerfully, shoving him onto the bed. “I’ll be here when you wake up!” </p><p> </p><p>“You will?” Shuichi asked as he got underneath the blankets.</p><p> </p><p>“Yup yup! Promise!” Ouma reached over and grabbed his hand, smiling softly. “I’ll hold your hand and everything so you know I won’t go.” </p><p> </p><p>“You don’t have to…” </p><p> </p><p>“It’ll make me feel better, nishishi~” </p><p> </p><p>“Alright.” Shuichi laughed. He squeezed his hand, nearly laughing again as Ouma’s face went blank. “You alright?” </p><p> </p><p>“Fine.” Ouma replied. He looked ready to cry again, blinking rapidly to stop tears. “Just thought um...thought I never would get to do things like this again.”</p><p> </p><p>“It’ll be okay, I think. I’ll be okay!” He hoped the smile he gave Ouma soothed him a little. “And when I get out of here, you won’t have to worry anymore.” </p><p> </p><p>“Right...you should probably get to sleep. Sleep well, Shu.” </p><p> </p><p>~</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Kokichi is dead.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Kokichi got crushed underneath the hydraulic press.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Kokichi died, crushed into nothing. It was a challenging murder to solve, but he still did it. Through all the heartache of the case, he did it.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Both Momota and Kokichi are gone now, and Shuichi feels helpless. He’s exhausted and pressed for time, Kiibo’s going to destroy the academy in just a few hours. There was no time to grieve.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Kokichi’s lab pours salt in the wound though. It’s filled with childish things: radios, toys, clown masks, silly capes and stacks of playing cards...he wouldn’t have ever believed that Kokichi was a remnant by looking at it.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> He had given up on Kokichi and now here he was. The person he loved was dead and he was alive. It was cruel, it always was. He kept losing people over and over and </em>for what?</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Shuichi remembers one conversation they had when Kokichi had dragged him out in the middle of the night.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> “ </em> You’ll protect me right? <em> ” Kokichi had asked. The bruises on his neck had just begun to yellow, the expression on the leader’s face far-away as he traced them.  </em></p><p> </p><p><em> “ </em> I want to protect everyone <em> , </em> Kokichi <em> .” Shuichi had replied gently. “ </em> But you the most. <em> ”  </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Kokichi had laughed about that a moment after he said it, giggling that he couldn’t really do much with such skinny arms. He had paused his laughing before looking at him and saying,  </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> “ </em> Well, I guess this’ll be over soon anyways! Kokichi and Shuichi soon-to-be happy forever! <em> ”  </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Shuichi wondered if maybe they could’ve had that happiness that Kokichi had spoken about not too long ago. The promise of tea parties and trips out to see the world, of meeting his family and learning Shuichi front to back.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> He wanted those days too. Winter mornings spent tucked on a couch near a fireplace, or dates at a late hour, only each other for company. Cheesy and simple things like that, that was what he wanted. But maybe Kokichi had lied about all of that too. Maybe he had been lying through his teeth about everything. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Kokichi was dead either way. He died just hours ago. Maybe 10 or so. 10 hours since Kokichi had been alive. He died because of a misunderstanding.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> He thinks he knew that Kokichi was underneath the press the entire time. He was in denial the whole thing.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> He knew the supreme leader wouldn’t ever have allowed Momota to die by his hand, even if Momota had one foot in the grave already.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> It was so stupid. </em> He <em> was stupid. His friends are dead now and he probably could’ve stopped it. Had he been more attentive—had he been a better </em>detective<em> not nearly as many people would have died.  </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> He could still have his friends.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Shuichi examined the clown mask in his hands. It’s labeled ‘Ouma’ in bright purple marker, so he knows it’s his. He let out a sigh and placed the mask back on its box and turned away from it, continuing his investigation elsewhere. </em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>remember to...do your homework and drink water. Till next time</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>maybe I’ll finish this maybe I won’t who knows. oomfs from twitter yell at me and remind me to write sometimes ty *goes to play miku game*</p></blockquote></div></div>
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